I love when someone randomly hands me a blog post.
Today during a funeral Erin came to me and said, "I think some man just handed me a huge bag of dope." To which I replied, "WHAT??"
Here's the story:
A man who was dressed in an extremely wrinkled suit (I swear it was balled up in the trunk of his vehicle before he put it on) approached EP with a black canvas zip up bag and asked her to hold on to it while he went into the chapel for the service (an uncommon, but not out of the realm of possibilities, request). Immediately upon taking it into her care she smelled that old familiar scent and came into my office to have the above conversation. Following my disbelief I went to the front desk to find the bag and was smacked in the face by the smell of A LOT of weed.
I moved into the centre office and I (yup, I'm like that) opened said bag to find at least a thousand dollars (street value) of weed broken up into sellable baggies. Intermingled amongst the weed was Axe body spray and packs of minty gum. If those were in there to mask the smell they were failing miserably.
After the funeral we could literally hear him bound down the hall looking for 'his bag'. At this point I replied, "Your bag is making my back office smell like a grow op!" To which he apologized. I asked him how sorry he was a couple of times (trying more so to hint that perhaps he should leave one of those conveniently pre-packaged bags with us to divie up) and then blatantly (after he missed my cues) asking him what the holding fee would be. He stupidly replied, "I'll never come here again." To which I replied, "Bullshit, we'll end up burying you.".
So, he leaves approximately $1000.00 worth of weed with random strangers after bringing it to a funeral for someone close enough that he was asked to be a pallbearer. And our coach driver is a retired Vice cop with Hamilton P.D. (oh of course I showed him!) I have to pose the question...is this the dealers first day on the job????
My mind? Officially BLOWN!