Tuesday, August 14, 2012

When They Were Boys, the Dead Sea Was Only Sick

I was reading an article at Vice website about senior citizens the author would 'sex up' and I got to thinking (funny how that happens from time to time)...who do I think is still crazy hot enough that I'd get dirty with them despite the fact that they should be giving me butterscotch candies and telling me stories about the depression?   I can still appreciate a handsome and distinguished older gent without it being too gross, right?  So I gave it some thought and here's my own personal list of old dudes I can see myself gettin' wit.  If ya knowwhatImean.  Ya you know!  I picked famous folks, because well...coming up with their photos wouldn't be nearly as creepy. 

These are in no particular order (I think).  And I made sure all of them were over 65 because 65 constitutes a senior discount at most places and the right to collect an Old Age Pension (or Social Security in the US of A) cheque and they are almost 30 years older than me.

1.  Ian McKellan - I know he's gay but since this list is never actually going to come to fruition does it really truly matter?  I thought not. 

2.  Tom Selleck - Shit guys, he's Magnum Fucking P.I.!  And that mustache seems like it would be a challenge all in and of itself.  And what girl doesn't like a challenge? 

3.  Max von Sydow - One of very few men to play both God and the Devil in films.  And while the movie wasn't great, his role in Needful Things was.  He's creepy and handsome. 

4.  Sean Connery - This one should be a freebie no?  I mean what kind of list would this be if he wasn't on here somewhere?  His voice makes him appealing.  I could listen to him talk dirty all night. 

5.  Bill Clinton - It's probably a power thing and an "I can tame his philandering ways" (egotistical of me, I'm aware) kind of thing all rolled up into one big ball of HELLO

6.  Harrison Ford -  Fighting aliens in outer space and having a wookie for a best friend is extremely sexy.  And I already know he's into the younger chicks. 

7.  Alan Rickman -  Harry Potter, Professor Snape.  Enough said. 

8. David Bowie - Man he's still hot after all these years.  Frankly in my opinion, he's gotten even hotter with age.  He's a legend in his own rights so I'd also do it for bragging rights. 

9.  Lemmy of Motorhead -  He's so ugly he's awesome.  And he's hardcore and probably has a few tricks up his sleeves...probably some STD's too so I'd make sure he wore a condom. 

10.  Iggy Pop - Oh man...for the same reasons as Lemmy 'cept as crazy as this fuck is, he's way, way, way hotter.  Me-ow!!! 

So there's a top ten list of men over the age of 65 who I'd be willing to go toe to toe with (sans clothing).  Probably a little gross but the point of this post was merely to be fun and entertaining and get me thinking outside of the box.  So grab your sense of humour and tell me who you'd be willing to sleep with who is at least 25-30 years your senior?  Leave your ideas in my comment section (because I like it and I'm uber curious who I forgot about) and we'll see if we can agree!



  1. Jack Nicholson... I mean if I had to do a guy. Women... Sophia Loren and Tina Turner. This feels wrong, I'm going to take a shower. Might have to be a cold one :)

    1. Jack Nicholson in his day, but now he's just chubby and gross. Unkempt.

      But your lady choices are pretty deece!

  2. Sean Connery...absolutely
    Clinton...that whole cigar thing made me crazy horny!
    My #1 choice...Sam Elliot...that man could make me cum just saying my name

    1. and Mickey Rourke...is he 65 ?? Twelve weeks with him and I am sure every S&M fantasy would come true

    2. Oooh Sam Elliot, I forgot him! Yes, I'd add him to my list.

      As for Mickey Rourke, he's aged so badly I can't bring myself to hop on that train. Now 20 years ago, oh Christ....

  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

  4. I agree with many of your list (Connery, Selleck, Ford, Clinton--maybe even Bowie, who is definitely hotter now than when he was younger). Unfortunately, I'm older than you, so for them to be 25 years older, they have to be at least 74. Man, that sounds really old! At least Connery still fits the requirements! Others that I might choose: Clint Eastwood, James Garner, Sidney Poitier. Can't really think of any other seniors that I might be interested in doing the nasty with.