The Big C

A couple of months ago I decided to spend the 8 bucks a month and subscribed to Netflix.  While I was quite disappointed that there wasn't more shows I wanted to see on there I have come across a few gems.  In a previous post I make mention of the show Madmen, which is awesome but this post is about a new show I've started. 

Marnie, at work, suggested I check out  "The Big C" when I got a chance.  Eric was out running errands and stuff so I thought it was the best time to start watching it as I was pretty sure he wouldn't be interested.  I ended up watching 9 episodes and cried through 7 of them (telling Eric to "F" off and get out of my bed when he laughed at me). 

Those who know me at all know that aside from frogs and toads my biggest fear is dying while my kids are still young.  I haven't quite determined if it's truly because I don't want to miss out on anything or if it's my need to be in control at all times and knowing that someone else will have control or if it's my narcissistic side telling me that my kids just couldn't fair well without me.  Regardless of the reasons I am terrified that something will happen to me while they are still young and need me.  It's an ongoing struggle for me when I have a young parent pass away and come through our funeral home. 

The main character Cathy has been diagnosed with Stage 4 Melanoma and has been given 1 1/2 year life sentence.  I know the show sounds morbid and dark right off the bat, but there is so much humour infused in it as well.   I also see my parenting skills in Cathy.  (If you wanted a good idea of how I parent my kids you could watch that show and it's pretty bang on.)  

My heart breaks in each episode as she struggles to teach her child (a snot nosed 14 year old boy) all the things she knows she isn't going to be able to, without actually telling him she's dying.  She hasn't told anyone except her new found friend/neighbour who is herself suffering from onset Alzheimers.  She's dealing with a breakdown in her marriage and trying to figure out how she's going to get through this without becoming a burden to her family, including her husband who just doesn't understand what's going on with her. 

If you get a chance to watch it, it's well worth the time.  They are only 1/2 hour episodes so they go by quickly (sadly).  The whole cast is great but Laura Linney, who plays Cathy, has basically enacted exactly how I would and want to behave if I'm ever given that dire news.   I get why Cathy is holding out telling her family (she doesn't want it to always just be about her being sick) but I think I'd need a better support system.  I would be bitter and angry.